Unplanned Parenthood B

B denotes book entry below blog.

I had planned to go to a funeral today. A precious friend had lost her dad, a brave and unique man and, for the sake of the family, I wanted to be at his services. Normally I do a bit of cleaning at the church on Saturday mornings and had intended to clean after paying my respects. But I woke up late, jumped into my sweats with nary a look at my planner and was off to the church in a flash.

No one else was cleaning when I arrived. Kate had been there early and left a note listing what she had done. I was happily working in the children's area when Jude arrived, clearly not dressed for work, and I knew the minute I saw him that I had blown it. He was on his way to the funeral and planned to return afterward to clean. Too late for me to run home and dress properly, and I was surely not attending in my sweats.

God has promised to work all things together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose (Rom 8:28-9) so I reminded Him that I trusted Him to work this out. He calmed my spirit and I had a grand time singing and talking to Him as I cleaned. I could do a good thing by finishing the work so no one else needed to do anything further today. That's my way of honoring Walter (my friend's dad) today. We will also sponsor a child through Compassion Ministries as a memorial to him.

Stephanie called last night. She will soon leave for Afghanistan for 10 to 14 months. We had a good long visit. We are both comfortable with her going, trusting God's will and plan for her life. I will try to pray rather than worry. David called this afternoon. He has had the same truck driving job for a good while now and enjoys it. His cat Thumbalina began her travels with him when she was just a kitten and loves the trucker's life. We visited for almost an hour until my phone batteries were basically dead. I am so proud of my children!

And my day was like this...

• 14:11 Missed a funeral I needed to be at. I simply forgot and didn't check my planner this morning.
  
• 15:00 David called. We had a long chat as he drove toward Toledo. He's found his groove.
  
• 15:14 Am setting up http://www.twhirl.org/ Sort of like TwitBin but free standing.
  
• 18:31 Working on another book entry.

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Unplanned Parenthood

Edgar Hamlet Snider was too big for the straight-back chair where he fidgeted beside his frail wife. Several times during their postal courtship Thelma had warned him that she was in poor health, but ever the optimist, he had glossed over anything negative.

The clinic was cold and drafty as they waited for the doctor who had summoned them. Edgar, who had never really met a person he truly disliked, didn't much care for doctors as a group and had only sought medical care the few times he'd been injured, like when a horse stepped on his foot. Now, the doctor had insisted both of them come in to review Thelma's symptoms. Edgar's right leg danced up and down rapidly on tiptoe, heel in the air.

The doctor, looking grave and harried, took a deep breath and closed the door when he entered the small consult room. It was sparsely furnished with three wooden chairs and a small table, all badly in need of paint. Without opening the folder he had placed on the table, the young medico introduced himself and offered his hand to Edgar. He was lowering himself into the chair even before the hand shake was released.

Edgar would later be unable to recall all the doctor told them save the fact that Thelma was pregnant and to carry the child to term might prove fatal. Something about a family history of eclampsia which had killed Thelma's mother. Thelma's present hypertension and kidney problems created a huge risk for eclampsia. 

Then there was the Rh factor. An antigen present in most people's blood but absent in Thelma's. She was "Rh negative" and that was an important issue that would cause the mother's body to fight against the baby's. It would be as if she were allergic to her own child if that child was Rh positive. If they didn't terminate the pregnancy, they would want to test Edgar's blood.

Terminate the pregnancy! What?!

"No!" Thelma spoke with quiet determination. "We will keep the baby no matter what. I will not even discuss killing my child and I never want it brought up again. Never!" Her face was ashen and her jaw set. Edgar had never heard her sound like this. He had expected her to look to him for support and guidance as she did about everything else. When she did turn toward him, she ordered, "Go give them your blood sample." Shocked, he immediately complied. They later learned he was Rh positive as was the baby.

The full impact of Thelma's pregnancy didn't set in until they got back to their tiny rented studio apartment. They were in awe. They were also terrified. Thelma believed only a miracle would bring her through the birth alive, yet it would be enough just to be a mother. Edgar had never planned to be a father. His first wife didn't want children and Thelma was supposedly unable to bear a child. Yet God had other plans. Soon they were laughing, both talking at once, acting like giddy teenagers.

The pregnancy was difficult and painful, fraught with perils one after the other. Edgar's new trucking business kept him away much of the time, but friends Bud and Roqua Deeter took doting care of the often bedridden Thelma. The rotund Roqua loved to cook almost as much as she loved her wine and she delighted in creating healthy fare fit for a gourmet palette all on a pauper's budget. Bud cleaned both the Deeter and Snider apartments weekly and worked with Edgar as a driver when he could. Edgar managed the laundry for both couples. The bonds of this friendship would grow ever closer and lifelong.

Amazingly, this precarious pregnancy was almost at term. Edgar had not realized how close he was to fatherhood until Thelma brought home news that the doctor said the baby would be safe to come any time now. Roqua celebrated with an increased intake of wine and a lavish meal for the four of them. They tried to play cards, but everyone was so distracted they laughingly gave up. Thelma was more animated than they had ever seen her, and soon they were going through all the baby things. The layette was all in pale greens and yelllows and the women folded and refolded each piece as they chatted about the baby's accommodations. There was no bassinet nor any room for one had they owned such a luxury. Thelma had converted a dresser drawer into a baby bed.

Edgar was uncharacteristically quiet. The month before, He had received an offer from a large trucking firm to buy out his fledgling company, Denver - Climax Trucking. He had turned it down but was now reconsidering it. His life was going places he had never intended and he was uneasy about that. Thelma was head over heels in love with the idea of parenthood, and he was excited, too. But deep down, he had doubts. After all, he was his father's son, albeit a sober version, still the wanderlust ran deep in his bones and he knew it.

Instead of going to work the next day, Edgar made arrangements to sell his little trucking company.  It was a cash buyout and within the week, he was paying cash for a small wood frame house in the downtown area of Denver. He had not included Thelma in either of these transactions, nor had it entered his mind to do so. He certainly did not expect her to be upset about being "blind sided," as she called it. 

Thelma's cheeks were flushed with anger which Edgar found quite attractive. He loved how her strawberry blond hair curled next to her fair-skinned blush. "How can you stand there grinning when you have treated me like I am nothing. Are we partners or not? You obviously don't think my ideas have any value!"

He expected tears, but there were none. She abruptly turned on her heel and left the apartment, slamming the door hard. He had never seen her like this. His first impulse was to follow her, but then memories of his confrontations with his first wife led him to reconsider. He would let her cool down and come back on her own.

Two hours later, Thelma had still not returned. Edgar went across the hall to the Deeter apartment and was horrified to learn they had not seen his wife.