Pickup Man

We've lived here about five months now and I still can't seem to organize the place and finish unpacking. I've had enough of that! An end to clutter and confusion, I say!

So today we went shopping for furniture solutions. We wanted an office wall rack or something to house printers, scanners, art printer (big), computer books, in and out baskets, and other office/techie space hogs.

We came home with a CD rack... a small CD rack.

Oh well.

I think I'll gut the place and start over. I can't find anything in there, anyway. Actually, most of the house is good, but the office is undeniably chaotic. I am at the kitchen counter with the laptop. I can't write in the office now. Too much of too much in there.

God has been gracious to provide us with some unexpected money and we are going to "fix" that office with it. Soon, I hope! I have some important work to do in there before Christmas.

Okay, this was deep. I, the woman who hates to shop, spent all day not finding what I want, but God blessed the day. Here's one lesson...

We were stopped at a light and noticed a well dressed woman on a bicycle loaded down with plastic shopping bags and a holding a large white piece of rolled felt. Riding one-handed and not looking at all, she turned into traffic and ran into a fairly new pickup leaving a nasty scrape all down the side. In doing so, she dropped much of her stuff. Now she's in the middle of a busy three-lane thoroughfare picking up her things, obviously unhurt.

The driver of the pickup is amazed. He first asks if she's alright and she nods, then he surveys the damage to his truck. The cyclist is unconcerned, riding out into traffic again with no hesitation at all. The pickup man stared, mouth agape, then shook his head and with a tolerent smile got in his truck and looked carefully before pulling out into traffic.

That man was wronged but didn't make a big deal of it. The woman was either completely uncaring or unable to grasp the situation. My guess is she had no idea of her own danger or her danger to others.

A lot of people are that way. Sometimes I am one of them. It's my mouth that is the problem, not a bicycle. I venture boldly into areas I should not enter, at least not without a cautious look and a prayer first. My words sometimes cause damage that I may not even know has happened.

I pray I will be more like the pickup man... he reminded me a lot of Jesus.

Time Off

As you see, I took the Thanksgiving weekend off... no blogs.

Although unexpected and just by the luck of the draw as it were, Richard actually had Thanksgiving day OFF! We had a wonderful time with Athena and Brian as we joined them at their friends' home out in the country. The food was delicious and the conversations stimulating and warm. It was a very special day we will always enjoy remembering.

Unlike most of America, we did not shop Friday or Saturday. Yesterday, we picked up a few needed groceries and some ink for my printer, but other than that, we avoided the stores and the crowds. I don't do well with either and in combination, they destroy my focus completely. But then, I've never been one to endure the crush of the crowd just to seek a bargain.

I was thrilled to receive another genealogy file for a branch of the family I had little info on. Also, my research has verified some very interesting kin folk and details. I would never have guessed that this venture would be so exciting... or so frustrating! I highly recommend seeking your roots and as many stories about your family as you can find.

There is one story I know you can find, your OWN! Others will want to read it; you may want to read it! Write it now while you can still remember it. I say this because there is so much of my own story I can't remember now.

Happy Thanksgiving

This has been such a wonderful day. I feel better than I have in weeks. My house is mostly clean, and I spent a glorious time with the Lord - reading the Word and praying.

Richard took me out to lunch and our waitress was genuinely friendly. Her smile was warm and infectious and she seemed truly honored to serve us. He gave her a $5 (33%) tip, something way out of character for my Sweetie.

A servant's heart is something pleasing to the Lord, and to man. Jesus came with the heart of a servant, even stooping to wash feet, the most menial of tasks... even laying down His life. I pray I can develop and reflect a servant's heart, too.

After my Honey went to work, I spent about an hour in the yard, watering, pulling some weeds, enjoying the mild bite of the fall breeze. It was good to be outside behind the house in our stand of tall pines. We're far enough out of town to escape the smells of the city, and the delicate scents of grass and trees and earth mingled to dance ever so lightly through my olfactories.

We are joining Athena and Brian at a friends home to for a festive celebration of Thanksgiving and food. There will be about ten of us. I like that. Good things are always better when shared with others... well usually. Anyway, all I will be cooking is the mashed potatoes.

Have a blessed Thanksgiving!
Here's a link to my Thanksgiving page:
http://ionanet.com/press/cards/thanks.htm

A Good Cup Of Coffee

Before anything else, I'd like to share with you this lovely site a sweet friend told me about: http://susie1114.com/LiveALife.html

I feel a bit better and can breath without pain today, yay! I am at that stage of recovery that makes you think you have more umph that you really do. I decided to vacuum and mop. Our house is tiny, so it's not a real big chore... Today it was! I had to stop and rest four times. Now I am just lazily tired and will do some decadent thing like watching TV instead of writing a decent blog. But I have a treat sent by the above friend, Kat. Read it with care, then spend a few minutes looking inward. I hope it impacts you as much as it did me.

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned to complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee,the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups, of porcelain, plastic, glass, and crystal - some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

When each of the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken up first, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves that is the source of your problems and stress.

"Be assured that the cup, itself, adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases, the 'nicer' cup is just more expensive, and the more impressive cup may come to appear more important than what it contains. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... and then began eyeing each other's cups.

"Now consider this: Life is the coffee, and jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of the Life we live. If we concentrate on the cup, we may fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us."

God, not the cups, brews the coffee... enjoy your coffee.

Maybe Better

I hopefully am better for good. I thought I was better two days ago only to relapse within two hours of that wishful thinking. Now, I think I am a bit better. Will write a real post in a day or so... meanwhile I pray all is well with you, and ask your prayers that I really am finally getting better!

Touch and Go

I have a bad cold. It started Thursday. I felt it coming on as I went to a meeting of GIVEBACK. (More about that when I feel better). Slept all day yesterday. Was better this morning and went off to Disney with Richard, daughter Athena and friend Brian, but began to feel poorly again, so came home and slept all afternoon. Still feel rotten, so this is to touch base with you and go back to sleep.

Breakdowns

Yesterday, I took my Mac to the Apple store. It had had a stroke and was unconscious. Replacing the power supply revived it and we suffered no loss of data... I thank God, for I was sure praying.

This afternoon, my laptop PC went into a coma for no reason I can imagine, then later came back. I am busily trying to back up everything so may not get much written for a day or two. Okay, I know I should already have backed all the important stuff, gigs if it!

Meanwhile, I wonder what we all did before our finances and our photos and everything in between was digitized... Hmmm?

The Weeds Won

I thought it would take an hour or so, but weeding and feeding our so-called lawn took all day! Many weeks (or maybe months) ago I bought a big bag of stuff to kill weeds and feed the grass. The bag languished in a corner behind the garbage can and I forgot all about it.

Then this weekend we bought three more bags of weed and feed miracle pellets because I was sure we had none. Today I put all of it on the green stuff in our yard. It's no longer really a lawn because there are more round leafed plants (dollar weeds) that bladed ones, but I have faith that I have spread enough pellets on this yard to kill any and every weed plus turn our puny grass into a super lawn.

After you sling the pellets, you must "water them in," whatever that means. Being unsure whether to apply a light sprinkle or call forth a deluge, I chose the latter and watered all day. The wind was blowing so sprinklers were out of the question. Hose in hand and hunched over to see if the pellets were dissolving, I sprayed away for hours.

Finally, a well meaning neighbor came by late in the day and shook his head sadly. "You're too late," he said, "the weeds have already won." I thought he was joking, but after a closer look, I am beginning to think he may be serious... and right.

So tonight I am tired and sore, but our grass is fed and the weeds attacked, albeit perhaps too late. If the weeds have won, at least I got some fresh air and a feeling of being "close to the earth."

What If?

In her journal of 11/3/06, my friend Eva talked about fears we all have, some foolish and some deep-rooted and real. She says she has a silly fear that if she gets lost while driving, she'll never find her house again. It sent me into peals of laughter, not because it's kinda kinky (it's not uncommon, really) but because I am so constantly lost I would soon go insane if that were one of my irrational fears.

With me, it's the edge of a steep dropoff, like a gorge or even on a bridge. Even if there is a safety rail, I am afraid to look down. I do anyway because I want to see the splendor below, but my heart pounds and my palms get all sweaty. Then it takes several minutes for the adrenalin quivers to wear off. I know no one is going to push me off and I am never tempted to jump, but the fear is there and it's there every time.

We don't really take these kinds of fears seriously, though, but as my friend said, there are fears for the safety of our children and other loved ones... and fears for our own lives. These concerns are real and can be elevated from below the conscious level to the very forefront of our awareness so that every breath is ragged, or we simply hold that breath trying to stop the danger.

What if my child is abducted, molested, hit by a car, has cancer... dies? What if my spouse or parent or best friend is in an accident, has a heart attack... dies? Or apply all the above to self. what if I suffer? What if I die? Who will take care of my children, my spouse, my job, my projcts?

How will the world get along when I'm gone? No, of course that isn't the major issue, but we do care about those left behind. Way down inside we feel the loss they would feel. Also, we don't want to miss seeing our kids grow up and playing with future generations of kids. Like my friend, I am ready to see Jesus, but still want to stay here as long as can be.

Some things are simply beyond our control. My mother was a worrier. She loved God, but I don't think she trusted Him to take care of all the details the way she would. I've tried not to, but in many ways I have turned into my mother. I worry too much. Especially since my brain doesn't work quite right.

I have lived long enough that many of the "What If's" have already come into my life. I have lived through the tragedies of losing a child, having children molested, losing parents and other loved ones, helplessly watching my children suffer from disease, be hit by a car, endure pain I wish I could have born for them. I have also endured personal illness and injury and heartache... and through it all, I was never alone. I sometimes felt alone, but Jesus was there and He still has not left.

God never promised no pain. He did promise to see us through if we'll trust Him. I don't know why He allows some things to happen, but I trust His nature of love and the wisdom of His perfect plan and I know He keeps His promises.

My prayers for self and loved ones are for safety, healing, long life, etc.... but more that my will be subordinate to God's. I trust HIM that He will never let us suffer needlessly, and when we have prayed in faith for healing, we shall be healed at just the right time and in the right way in accordaqnce with His perfect understanding, grace and mercy. So I also pray that whatever good thing a problem or pain is doing in your life or mine will be accomplished in spite of our aversion to it. Most of all, I pray we will notice that Jesus is right there beside us, holding out His nail scarred hand, waiting for us to trust Him enough to take hold of that loving hand so He can lead us through to safety and peace.

Scootin' Around

When Donna was here, we went to Disney several times. The International Food & Wine Festival was a big hit with us, but we found you cannot come close to seeing and tasting it all in a few visits. On one visit, we rented electric scooters, and what a difference that made! We both were able to save lots of time and energy, thereby enjoying the park and festival so much more.

At the time, Donna suggested that it wouldn't take many days of scooter rental to pay for one of my own. I thought about that. I had seen them advertised for as low as $600, Richard and I talked it over and decided it would be a good thing to do as long as I am diligent to go the the gym and work out regularly (I am joining a health club next week paid for by Well Care).

So, yesterday I was off to Epcot on my little red scooter which cost exactly $600. It's a tiny little thing, but it ran fine and plenty fast. Unlike the big handicap scooters, this one comes apart in about 30 seconds and fits in the trunk. The heaviest part is only 29 pounds. We bought it used but it looks brand new and has an upgraded seat.

I am thankful for the scooter and for the ability to buy such an unnecessary thing purely for recreation. Indeed, God has blessed us in so many ways. It's much cheaper to live down here, and even though my Workmens Comp payments are ending, I believe we'll be fine.

I have been declared "Permanent & Stationary" meaning I am no longer "Temporarily Totally Disabled," which means a lot legally, I guess, but not much to me. While I agree that I am "Permanent" (Jesus saw to that) I doubt that I am very "Stationary," at least I hope not.

I see I have not sent out my thank you notes. They are still here on the counter... I HATE that. Nice people put me up, fed me and loved me and I haven't sent as word of thanks. Bummer!

I better get off my little red scooter and get my planner in gear!

2 Days

(I wrote this yesterday and thought I had published, not so, so here it comes tonight)
Florida has a neat thing. You can go to a web site, type in your drivers license and other info and list two people to be contacted in case of emergency. What a great and efficient way to let loved ones know if you've been in an accident or disaster. All they need is your drivers license number and officials can tap into a data base with your contact info on file. How cool is that!!? Here's a direct link to set it up: https://www6.hsmv.state.fl.us/dlcheck/findcustomer

This system will also give peace of mind to loved ones. For example, I know that if Richard is injured, ill, etc. someone from the state will contact me on my cell phone and let me know where and how he is. I'll need to be keeping better track of my cell phone, though. I leave it all sorts of places and don't hear it when it rings.

Well, now for today's scribbling:
We went to Epcot because the International Food & Wine Festival is winding down and there is a great deal we haven't seen and tasted. We're not too much interested in the wine part. Neither of us knows anything about wine nor are we especially fond of it, although I do use good wines in cooking. The foods are another matter. All around the World Showcase, there are special stands serving chef created delicacies from different countries. The praices are even reasonable.

Richard and I went in separate vehicles because he had to be a work at five, and I stayed on the enjoy the park and the food a bit longer. In fact, I was in the park until an hour after closing. Actually, that's my favorite time. Nearly all the people have left and you can enjoy the beauty of the place in peace and quiet.

Oh, I enjoy the people, too, and had some nice visits with a number of folks including a marine biologist from Canada and a couple from just north of New Orleans. Sometimes, though, I feel overwhelmed by all the people and noise and visual stimuli. I find quiet nooks here and there and just watch the people. Sometimes, I retreat to a restroom, but even there it can be crowded and noisy.

Tomorrow is Richard's day off. We are going to drive over to the eastern coast and take a one day "cruise." I doubt I'll be home with enough energy or time to post, so stay blessed... I love you all!