Other Wise

I joined my friend Sasha for dinner at Bongo's Cuban Restaurant tonight. It's been a long time since we had a good visit and much has happened in each of our lives. Our meal was delicious and the conversation stimulating. It was a boost for both of us. Good things are happening in Sasha's life and career and it was uplifting to hear about them. Also, I have a more accurate focus for my prayers in her behalf.

Earlier today I had a warm online chat with Athena. She is such a delightful person and so fresh. She always blesses me, often in unexpected ways. Today she told me about PubMed which is a service of the U.S. National Library of Medicine that includes over 17 million citations from life science journals for biomedical articles back to the 1950s. Wow!

Our granddaughter Trudy called the other day (I lose track of days) and let us in on wonderful news. We're going to have a third great grandchild in late September! Trudy and Chi have one child, Connor, and wanted another, so they are excited, just as we are. Connor has his Daddy's eyes and rich skin tones. Now, I hope if this new little one is a girl, she gets Trudy's eyes which are like none I've ever seen, just stunning. Mysterious and lovely. They live in the Salt Lake City area and we won't get to see them until family reunion in June.

I haven't read all today's email yet but I did open a special note from my friend Donna. It was long and newsy and SO Donna! I loved it! I could almost hear her bubbly voice and see her smiling eyes as I read. She is so full of warmth and the Holy Spirit lights up her whole being.

Last night was the last "Back Yard" cookout at The Vine, at least for a while. We'll be starting small groups in people's homes next week. The course of study will last six weeks and we're looking forward to learning and growing and getting to know a different group of folks.

Funny how important others are in our lives. I can get caught up in all the things I "have" to do and end up not communicating and socializing, but I know it's not good for me. I'm a gregarious person who really needs others.

Getting Serious (Again)

It was just after noon and I was reading as I ate lunch when I noticed my eyes burning as well as my nostrils and throat. Pulling my attention away from the novel I was engrossed in, the acrid stench of burning chemicals pierced my consciousness and startled, I rushed to the stove.

There in the bottom of my favorite Analon pan was a smoldering glob of cream colored goo bubbling and spewing out noxious fumes. It was connected to a moldering stretch of blue flowing, oozing misshapenly from there up to the lip of the pan. The cremated remains of the minestrone soup I had prepared in for lunch coated much of the pan, molasses colored and smoking. And yes, the burner was on. I had left a rubber ended spatula to simmer into toxic goo.

I had to have a serious talk with myself and my Lord. I had to get serious about how many careless and potentially dangerous things I had done lately. I had to focus on why, on how to "fix" these errors. I had to do an EA (Error Analysis) and get down to the business of properly managing my recovery from TBI.

It's time once again to work harder and focus on managing my life. Pure laziness is at the root of this. I have not used my planner and my strategies as diligently as I should. I got wrapped up in the novel and lost focus on the here and now. Reading is good, but I am the compulsive sort and need to set up rules to prevent myself from becoming totally absorbed. I little discipline is called for!

Yesterday, Richard and I voted early and drove to Kissimmee to deliver muffins to friends. Then we went to Daytona Beach and filed a police report on the time share sales scam I've written about before. Trying to link our case with others wasn't getting anywhere and the officer we spoke with last suggested filing a new report. While in Daytona Beach, we ate at a wonderful Christian cafe/chocolatier, Angell & Phelps. The food was more than wonderful and the prices reasonable. Their chocolate factory delivers all over.

Driving home, we chose to explore a bit and chose  the roads less traveled by, as they say. Stately southern mansions somewhat past their prime laid claim to expanses of lush law, and huge live oaks dripping with Spanish moss watched as a lazy, murky steam flowed slowly, silently by. People were sitting on the steps of a patched and tarped  house trailer covered with mold. They stared sightlessly into space and ignored the trash covering most of their unmowed yard. We drove through small towns with wonderful old Main street buildings. They seemed to be abandoned and a covered with a thin layer of dust, not an earthy dust, but the dust of disuse.

Once home, we had a light supper and worked on a jigsaw puzzle as we watched election results. I missed my Bible and prayer time... but there was no guilt. My Lord and I had spent a wonderful day together and I had been communicating with Him all day long.

New Freedom

When I visited my neuropsychologist last Monday we discussed what is perhaps the most troubling of the varied effects of my brain injury, my tendency to become quickly and severely overwhelmed without warning so that my brain does not function at all well. It can freeze my thought processes or slow them to a crawl making me completely ineffectual, or sometimes merely dull.

I call it "flooding," a term I borrowed from the author of "Over My Head." A change in light intensity, fatigue, noise, too many stimuli, etc. can cause me to flood at times, yet there are times I can tolerate these things with only minimal distress. I can never predict my response, so I am always a little nervous about shopping, any social event, performing any important task, ect. The unpredictability bothers me as much as the actual flooding event.

My first brain injury was in 1988 and I spent several years in a wheelchair. In time, I was healed both physically and cognitively with little residual, although Dr. Schutz says he still sees effects of that injury. I believe that the healing I did experience came from the Lord because brain damage is permanent. Then in 1992, I suffered another brain injury with little physical impairment but considerable cognitive involvement. Again, over time, I improved... so much so that by the time I sustained my last head injury in 2004, I was working quite successfully as a Wal-Mart assistant manager at one of California's busiest stores. There are few jobs more demanding or filled with more stimuli. I was doing fine in spite of the two previous brain insults. Flooding was never a problem for me there, even in that hugely busy environment. Give God the credit again!

So now it has been over three years since my latest TBI and, while there has been great improvement, I have reached a plateau and stayed there. I cannot say I am anywhere close to as functional as I was on 9/7/04, the day before my accident. God healed me before and I guess I have been expecting Him to do an encore. I had to admit to my doctor and friend, Dr. Schutz that I have been a bit irritated about the continued problems my leaky, unpredictable brain causes.

Dr. Schutz accused me of being prejudiced against brain injured people. That stopped me cold. I hate prejudice of any sort, but he may be right in a way. By resenting my own injured brain, I have been making a tacit statement against all TBI victims. Not a good thing! And it is inhibiting my own recovery.

I have been viewing every flooding incident and every brain malfunction as a failure thus causing me to become increasingly dissatisfied with myself and less willing to venture into activities and relationships. I find myself warning others that I will make mistakes, predicting I will fail. There is an old saying, "You don't know who you are until you know what you can do," and since I never know from one day to the next what I can do, I bought into that whole concept. But it is a lie! I DO know who I am! I am a child of God, a King's daughter, and my Father has a plan for my life (which isn't over yet!) a very special plan that includes the brain that I have now.

Dr. Schutz reminded me I have already received my miracle of healing, that my response to the flooding, to brain malfunctions of any kind is what matters. I have been granted the freedom to flood. When (not if) it happens, instead of reacting with panic and fear, I will let it happen, stop until it passes, then go on, praising God for the victory. So if, as often happens, I flood while shopping and have to abandon my cart and leave the store. Instead of responding with shame, self loathing and anger, I will thank God and congratulate myself that I had sense enough to remove myself from overstimulation and accept the break as a welcome respite. When I make other cognitive errors, I will continue to do my EA's (Error Analysis reports) and work on creating preventative strategies.

New freedom! Freedom I enjoyed this morning as I went to volunteer at the homeless mission in Kissimmee without the nagging thought in the back of my mind that I might flood, that I would forget what people told me, that I would seem stupid or dull... or worst of all, that people would be condescending to me. I had a great time. Yes, there were times I lost track of what I was doing. I had some spasticity and managed to make a mess or two, but I didn't freak out, not even quietly. When I felt fatigue creeping up on me, I had sense enough to leave... without beating myself up. Quite the contrary, I was pleased with myself and proud to be a TBI survivor.

But I did have a bit of a lesson in humility. I have prayed that the Lord would increase my humility, make me more patient and teachable. He answers those kind of prayers big time! I was cutting onions when Chris the director of that kitchen showed me another way, saying she feared I would cut myself. I was insulted. I didn't like being told what to do or how to do it. I said I had been cutting onions that way for 50 year, blah, blah, blah. What a jerk! I was a snot! I told her I would do it her way in her kitchen, but.... What is WRONG with me!?! The Holy Spirit let me know just how prideful and petty I was being, so with a very contrite heart, I told Chris how sorry I was and that her way was indeed much better. She was quite gracious and seemed not to have noticed that I was behaving badly.

Tired Times

It has taken since January 4th until now to try to get money to Colorado. I was a trustee for someone and the other trustee was in Colorado. The funds had been invested but now, for many reasons, all of them good, the trust is dissolved and the money needs to be distributed to the one for whose benefit it was set up years ago.

The funds had to be redeemed, a check sent to me, then sent by me to the other trustee for signature. Once signed, it was sent back to me so I could sign and deposit it. Sadly, it took a week to come from the Mutual Fund to me, then I sent it overnight to Colorado, but it took 2 days, and then another day to be signed, Well, time dragged on and it was at last deposited in my brokerage cash account with Edward Jones.

Normally, funds are not available for 5 days after deposit, however the sweet folks at the Edward Jones office spent much of the day monitoring that check and once it cleared the originating bank, I was called. Then both Richard and I had to sign the wire transfer order since we are both owners on the account and it was going into an account of a different name. By the time all that happened, it was too late for the wire transfer today. The money needs to be in Colorado tomorrow.

The whole thing made me tired.

I was sleeping in a Publix parking lot when Richard called me. He was at church and thought I would meet him there. Eventually, I did, and the food, fellowship and service all blessed me. The message was on the parable of the sower. I am noticing there are thorns and weeds in my life... Richard and I talked about all the things that try to choke out Christ in our lives.

Wonderful Day

The ladies Bible Study was wonderful! There were perhaps 18 women there and enough were willing to participate to make the discussions interesting and lively. I am so thankful to Brandy for inviting me. She's quite an inspiring young lady. The mother of six yet very young herself, she has a quick smile, twinkling eyes and an obvious love for the Lord.

I met Richard at our Kissimmee house after the Bible study and we measured the living room for base board, then went over to Home Depot and got some plastic base board. It looks like painted wood and will be easy to install, durable and require no painting. We plan to install it tomorrow.

While we were at the house I noticed a teenage raccoon laying near a shrub. He was alert but made no move to get away as I approached. He was not obviously injured but I was sure he had been hit by a car or attacked by a dog. Something made him unable or unwilling (due to pain) to use his hind legs. Richard went to get him help. The SPCA was on the way. My heart wanted me to try to help him but my head and experience as a Humane Society volunteer in the 1960's warned me not to touch him without protective gloves. We decided to let the "pros" take care of him. I suspect he had a spinal cord injury, poor thing. I can still see his soft ears and the odd look on his face. He didn't seem to be in pain or especially fearful, just confused.

We had to leave so I could get to my doctor's appointment in time. We came home to get the forms I needed Dr. Schutz to fill out then hurried off to his office. We arrived right on time... but we ended up at his house! Oops! I called and got the answering machine. As I began to record my message, his wife (and nurse receptionist, billing person) came on the line. She had asked me when I made the appointment if I recalled where the office was and I assured her I did. Wrong! She good naturedly gave me the correct address and we headed out again.

Dr. Schutz will take care of my California Disability insurance papers. He knew exactly what they needed. The rest of my hour was more help than I can say. He has given me a whole new slant on my recovery. He rightly assessed much of my "flooding" problem as my own response to those times when I become overloaded.

For example when I am shopping and begin to be overwhelmed and end up retreating to my car abandoning my cart, instead of reacting with frustration and disappointment in myself, I should consider that I am responding properly to the situation at hand. I obviously cannot continue to shop when my brain is no longer processing, so leaving is a wise choice. After I am more calm, rested or ready, or when there are fewer people at the store, I can do my shopping again. Already, there is less dread of shopping! Yay!!

I can apply that attitude to any "flooding" situation. I know that I can become quickly and easily overwhelmed, but instead of fearing that, I can decide when this happens, I will just stop and that I don't care what folks think about that. I will take my time and just tell them I need to wait a minute. Sure hope it works!

Our friend Sam gave us a Red Lobster gift card for Christmas and as we travelled from the doctor's office to the restaurant, Athena called just to visit. I was thrilled. She's such a cool lady, and my daughter! We chatted a bit and then we were going into the cafe so it was time to hang up. It was a good time to go - the dinner crowd not there yet -and they gave us a quiet booth. It was a luscious meal which I ate wisely, saving over half for later.

So, all-in-all it's been a wonderful day!

Sunday Morning Comin' Down

I woke up early (for me) and lay there for a while exulting in the luxury of the warm, quilted softness of our bed. I dozed in and out and did not immediately realize it was Sunday - I tend lo live in the moment, but may not always know exactly where that moment is in the continuum of time.

I was thrilled to somehow realize today was the Lord's Day (well, they all are, really). Not everybody does, but I love Sundays! For some, Sunday is a reminder of emptiness, aloneness, unworthiness. One of my favorite evangelical songs is "Sunday Morning Comin' Down" by Johnny Cash. (I am a huge fan of Cash). It is not overtly a Gospel or evangelical song, but the message leads there. It speaks of a man who has no ties, no place to go, his life filled with drink and smoke, walking the sleepy Sunday sidewalks wearing his cleanest dirty shirt. A man who does not say it but surely feels he would not be welcome in the church where he stops outside to listen to Sunday School songs being sung.

I got ready for the day I love best, humming Cash's song as I pulled on jeans and a bulky cotton sweater. It's winter today. Tugging on my tennies, I prayed for all the lonely ones who feel they'd be unwelcome in God's house, knowing that some of God's people would not welcome these outcast ones. I prayed for softer hearts in believers, hearts more like Jesus'.

The windows in my house were all covered with condensation because it was cold last night and our heater ran. I was particularly interested in the moisture which had formed on the plastic windows of our Florida room. I have never known how to safely clean them but as I wiped the mist from the first pane I discovered it came beautifully clean, so, of course I washed all of them, singing "Sunday Morning Comin' Down" as I worked.

Sunday morning is coming down on me in a wonderful way, thank you, Lord. I hope you'll pray with me for all those who are lonely, hurt, and feel unloved. I am not an especially lovable sort, myself, but even I am loved, and so is every person ever born, loved unconditionally for we can never do ANYTHING to make God love us more OR ANYTHING to cause Him to love us less. That is just SO awesome!!

I pray your Sunday morning is coming down softly and lovingly... and especially joyfully!

Frustration and Peace

Trying to comply with California's strange disability process, dealing with a doctor who hasn't even bothered to read the medical records sent to him over a year ago, having my bank refuse to accept a redemption check, and discovering workmen's comp has not yet paid for some medical services I received over a year ago... has made me frustrated, yet God's peace has flowed through and over the problems leaving me with a heart full of joy nonetheless.

I have been cooking and it always makes me happy to cook. The other day I made a great French dish of egg noodles, bacon, a cream cheese sauce, tomatoes, mushrooms, chives, onions and spices, but today I did a more traditional pork roast, gravy mashed potatoes and cream corn served with hot biscuits. We went for a walk after we ate and got caught in the rain. Nice. I like walking in the rain as long as it isn't cold or windy. It was a balmy night, but Richard wanted to get inside because we were under a tornado and thunderstorm watch.

I am proud to say I've finally conquered the paperwork! All the filing and sorting are done and the archives will be safely boxed in plastic containers which I hope we never need to open. I am ready to do taxes, but we don't have all the W-2's and other paperwork yet, so I'll organize my closets next. Richard's clothes are all orderly but mine are just mixed all over the closet. I haven't set up my drawers yet, either. My stuff is still in laundry baskets in the closet. How sad is that!?

I spend at least an hour every morning in Bible study and prayer, usually as I eat breakfast. It started years ago when I had "Lunch with the Lord" after my little ones had had their noonday meal and were having their nap/quiet time. I still eat Lunch with Him, too. I found that I would never have time for God unless I planned it, and I know how much I need to be with Him. I am not by nature a nice person and left to my own habits, I get bossy and cranky.

Monday I am joining a ladies Bible study at First Baptist in Kissinnee. They are studying Beth Moore's "Jesus, The One And Only." I am truly excited about this because I need a ladies group who meet weekly. I have missed that since I came to Florida.

Anxious? Who, Me?

We got a call today saying the folks who made the offer on our house decided not to buy in this area after all. So our house is still on the market.

I went to my neurologist this morning to have him fill out my California Disability form. He didn't even look at it. He came in late and had an office full of people. I was first on the list. He thumbed through my chart, wrote my six month prescription for pain and sleep meds as usual and said since he didn't treat my cognitive issues he couldn't help me, but if I would bring in a copy of what my neurologist filled out last time, he would use that info to fill in this form.

As usual in a stressful situation or when expected to meet the challenge of change, I "flooded" and could not even think to ask him to review the medical records he had from my other doctors in California. He clearly stated all he intended to do was keep me comfortable, and I was helpless to respond.

I am at a loss. I called Dr. Schutz for an appointment but he is a PhD not an MD and I don't know if that will work for California. I called them to try to get a copy of the original claim so I could take it to my neurologist who I suspect just wants it for a pattern, but I was so confused I got the whole conversation mixed up.

Meanwhile the 20 days I had to get this form signed are ticking away.

The Bible says be anxious for nothing and bring every care before the Lord with prayer and supplication. We are to trust the Lord knowing He has a plan that is best even though it may entail some hardship, some pain.

To the core of my being I love and trust God, so why am I anxious about all this? Because I am weak and impatient. Thank goodness God is faithful, full of mercy and will always take care of me. He knows how easily I fall into the sin of worry and even now as I write, His peace has begun to flow through me and I am reminded to be still and know that He is God.

Even if I lose my benefits and the house does not sell and we cannot meet all our obligations (some new ones have arisen)... even then, He will have a plan that works all things together for good. He is my loving Father and has made that vow to me (and to all who love Him and are called according to His purpose).

I am praying for healing of our finances. Wow! God is so cool. The Holy Spirit has brought serenity flowing through me like a river of peace. It is actually going to be fun to see what He does with our money situation.

Good News-Bad News

We have an offer on our house in Kissimmee! It is much lower than we hoped for but as high as the market will bear at this time, so we accepted. We pray the house is a blessing for the buyer. The sale will surely be a blessing to us!

In a notice dated 1/11/08, the state of California notified me that as of 12/28/07 I am no longer impaired, disables or unable to work, so my benefits have been terminated. I called to ask how they determined I was no longer suffering from the effects of TBI and was told that it was stated on my original claim form that I would be fully recovered on that date. What?! Trying to get any sensible explanation out of the lady giving out this strange information was just plain futile. Finally she informed me I would need to be recertified. Meanwhile, my benefits are withdrawn.

I made an appointment to see my neurologist tomorrow morning. He's quite flamboyant and not a fan of government paperwork, so I suspect he'll go ballistic when he hears that a medical finding has been made from almost three thousand miles away by a government worker.

God is bringing some changes to our lives and finances. All things considered, I am quite at peace and we greatly enjoyed a meal, good fellowship, a time of worship and a great lesson with our church family this evening.

Living in the Library

I think I had a serene Sunday yesterday. I don't remember most of it, but I recall church which was good.

I sorted paperwork most of today, weeding out what needs to live in the filing cabinet in our office, what needs to be stored and what can be tossed. I am proud of the progress I made and feel confident I can finish tomorrow. Next, I'll start sorting our photos and keepsakes. That will take some real time!

I had long phone visits from Sonja and Sam who both said the weather there has been warmer but is about to get super frigid. It has been cooler here today and we actually have the heat on, but our cooler is warmer than their warmer... oh, never mind.

I may explore the library tomorrow. We found it on Saturday when we were looking for the post office. I love libraries. If I am ever homeless, I'll live in my car and spend my days at the library. Seriously! Actually, I read about a homeless lady who did just that. She now has shelter, praise God.

Rain

Rain is soothing my soul with its own special sound as it beats against the roof of our sun room and the lashes at the windows. A good, soaking rain we really needed. Our grass looked thirsty today and we both commented on it. Obviously, the Lord heard and responded even though we didn't actually pray for rain. I love how He loves to do those little favors for His children.

We are on watering restrictions here and can only water one day a week and only at certain hours, which seems bizarre to us since we are surrounded by water here. But these folks think we're in drought conditions. They ought to take a stroll around the eastern plains of Colorado!

I've been sorting papers all day, well until Richard came home, anyway. Then we drove over to Lakeland looking for a UPS or Fed Ex place so we could overnight some money to Colorado. Amazingly, there was not one place open! Not wanting to waste the trip, we went to the Golden Corral and enjoyed the buffet at predinner senior rates. In spite of all our dining out, I have dropped most of the wight I gained over the holidays. Not all, but most.

My beautiful niece Donna is in the hospital and now weighs only 91 pounds. Please pray for her. She has incurable Host Vs Graft Disease as a result of the bone marrow transplant that saved her life several years ago... I think it's been 8 years now. Donna and I are not only relatives but close, close friends. She shared with me that some of my daughters found it hard to believe she enjoyed hanging out and visiting with me about all sorts of things, that we had a close friendship. She felt they thought there wasn't much to talk with me about.

I sometimes feel that way about them. Not that they aren't interesting, they are incredible, but that I don't know much about their day-to-day lives. Somehow the intimacy got lost along the way, or they still think of me as someone who might "judge" them? Or perhaps, I am too unfamiliar with modern ways, a bit provincial in my thought patterns. I don't know..... But I would love to be as close to all as I am to some of them.

Jasper the cat has come in and wants me to follow him to his food bowl. Each cat has their own food bowl and each has a special (and different) kind of food. Jasper likes his bowl to be quite full and alerts me well before it gets to the halfway mark. He's getting pretty demanding, so I'll sign off now and tend to his dining needs.

Week in Review

We went to Disney World Monday with Tami and her friends Virginia and Shannon. Shannon wasn't feeling well, though, so we took him back to their hotel after our stint at the Magic Kingdom. From there, we went to Epcot and spent the rest of the day. We dined at the Coral Reef Restaurant in The Seas pavilion. Our table was right next to the glass of the huge salt water aquarium and green sea turtles, sharks and other denizens of the deep watched as we ate. Every table has a view of the aquarium which makes up one whole wall of the cafe, but we were actually touching the glass! The only thing that would have made the day better was if Athena could have been with us. She is a working lady, however and this was a Monday. Oh well.

I don't really remember Tuesday and Wednesday except for "Back Yard" at our church that evening. I'm always blessed to be around our church family. I can never understand folks who claim to be Christians yet don't go to church and don't enjoy being with other believers. Sure, folks at church are not perfect and some can be downright nasty at times, but we're called to love one another anyway, warts and all! If we don't enjoy fellowship here on earth, how will we ever be happy with these folks for all eternity? 

Last night, Tami and Virginia joined us at Wolfgang Puck's restaurant. The food was great, but the crowd included a large party of very loud (and mostly drunk) people. It was so loud that even Richard was uncomfortable with it. After our meal, we all walked around Downtown Disney and Pleasure Island before going to La Nouba, the Cirque Du Soliel show. Wow! I had seen it before, but I was nonetheless spellbound. The performance was over the top and I won't even try to describe it. I'll merely say, GO if you get a chance! You've really never seen anything like this.

We had coffee after the show and then headed home, tired and overstimulated from the noisy meal, the excitement of the visit and the nonstop amazement of the show. It was great to spend so much time with Tami on Monday and yesterday. I wish we could see her and our other family more often. At least living in the Orlando area, we see some of them when they come for conventions, etc.

I have been working on digging out from under a mountain of paper. I have kept paperwork for years and we are buried in it. It will take a while, but I will keep at it until I get what we really need to keep organized and the rest dumped. Then I'll tackle the photos. If I get those two things done in the next two months, I'll feel like I really accomplished something!

Round the Table

We had pot roast and gravy for dinner. Dinner for six. How nice! Athena and Brian were here and Tami, another daughter, was here from Colorado. She brought along a friend Virginia who is also in the National Guard. They are here for almost a week at a Guard conference for recruiters. I love having the table full of food and all the seats filled. It's great to be with loved ones. We have such precious children and grandchildren!

In all the excitement of expecting our guests and planning the meal, I forgot it was Sunday. Richard must have suspected that I would do that because he called to remind me so I wouldn't miss church. I was running the vacuum and didn't hear the phone, so they had church without me.

Tami and her friend didn't have a great flight out and Virginia's luggage didn't arrive with them, so they were delayed. We started late but still had a fine time visiting with our loved ones and getting to know Virginia. Athena and Brian have other things they need to do tomorrow, but Tami and Virginia will join us for a day with Disney. We'll be getting an early start, so I'll head for bed now so as to be fresh tomorrow.

What a blessing it is to share the bounty the Lord has given us with our loved ones. I am ever amazed at the love the Lord lavishes on us!

Headache X 2

I've had bad headaches yesterday and today.

Good things happened today, too though. Richard baked his apple ugly cake tonight and I talked on the phone with daughter-in-law Julia and grandson Wyatt. I also had phone visits with friends Steve and Sam. It's nice to be loved.

I had a great time talking with the exterminator, too. I invited him to church but he already has a home church. It's wonderful he loves the Lord also.

Giveback was tonight but I was in no condition to be there, let alone drive myself to and from it.

It's still cold, but nothing like last night which was in the 20's.

My thoughts are short and disjointed during and after a headache.

The ugly cake is good and I'm going to bed.

Happy 2008!

We had a perfect New Years Eve. We went to a pet store for the special food our critters need and/or prefer, then got totally lost (yes, the Garmin was on, but I gave it wrong data) and hungry, so by chance found ourselves in the neighborhood of Mimi's cafe, which I love. Richard had never eaten there, so in we went.

I usually have the Quiche Lorraine, but tried the 5 oz. Fillet Mignon with asparagus and salad in a heavenly dressing. Richard had a huge specialty burger on sour dough bread. Mine was memorable, his good, but not enough for him to rave about. What am I saying? He doesn't rave about much of anything. I seriously doubt "rave" is one of the actions in his repertoire. If I ever see or hear him rave, I shall immediately begin praying as I dial 911.

We wanted to be home by dark so we wouldn't be on the road with the many happy folks heading off to celebrations, some of whom may not be sober, but it was dark by the time we got home and our friendly neighbors already had a party going across the street. We stayed home, played some games, reminisced about 2007, kissed one another as 2008 made the scene and were off to bed soon after. Before you decide we must be old, let me tell you that we have preferred to bring in the new year quietly since we were much younger.

I don't do well with alcohol (it sneaks up on me) and Richard has never cared for more than a drink or two. In my younger days I drank too much when we were out celebrating Richard's birthday with friends while were were doing grad studies Western State College in the mountain town of Gunnison, Colorado. I am terrified of small planes and not real fond of flying in general, but on that night, our friend Dennis and I were going to go to the airstrip where he planned to teach me to fly. ME! Who would never in my right mind even get in a small plane! So now, I limit alcohol to two drinks and rarely that. A toast, wine with dinner, not drinking for a buzz.

Some Christians believe alcohol is off limits and I respect them. Others feel that Jesus' first miracle was a message to say, cheer up and enjoy My salvation. Wine and joy are sometimes linked in scripture. Drunkenness, however is condemned as sin, and the Bible is full of stories showing the disaster and pain caused by alcoholic excess, so are most people's families, close or extended, including my own.

Also, I don't do well in crowds any more. Even our small church. By the time the service is over and I've had short visits with a few folks, I'm on the verge of overload so I leave. Richard has never been much for parties. He likes smaller groups better. We therefore had a great quiet New Year's Eve. Just right.

Our big outing today was a trip to Publix.

We also had the excitement of an electronic disaster when Richard somehow made the TV sound disappear, but in trying to troubleshoot, we got out video/DVD player and ended up and watching the movie "Big Fish." I cried. It was so much like my dad... and a few other members of our family. Tall tale tellers are often considered lovable liars, but we can sometimes miss the truthful parts of their yarns. Usually, they actually have some great adventures to share but we focus on disbelief instead of giving credence or simply enjoying the ride.

My dad never cared if folks believed him or not. He had some stories no one, including me, believed which I later found out were pretty much the truth. I felt I had let him down by doubting him. I also know what it's like to be disbelieved because parts of my life have been unusual and the kind of life God blessed me with invited adventure. Until recently, I've always welcomed that. Now, I don't cope as well. My brain is less predictable... but my God is not, so I guess I should invite adventure as much as ever.

Let's see what 2008 brings down the pike.